I Spy Something...Sweet

This week turned out to be surprisingly short, at least in terms of Russell's work week. Henry and Charlie's Mamaw and Papaw (Russell's parents) came for a visit on Sunday and left Monday morning, which was President's Day. Russell, as an employee of the state government, had the day off, and we spent it as we would a typical Sunday, having spent our actual Sunday as we would a typical Saturday. In the wee hours of Tuesday morning, Charlie played the dirty and inexplicable trick on me of awakening at 12:00 a.m. and remaining awake until 4:00 a.m., thereby incapacitating me for the remainder of Tuesday. Russell stayed home that day, too, in the interest of protecting the safety of myself and his offspring. The highlight of the day came around 4:30 p.m., after naps, when we finally got out of the house for a dinner-wrecking milkshake. So Monday and Tuesday: not so memorable.

On Wednesday, we went to our friend Kristin's house for a play date. The stated focus of the play date was a craft in which the kids made butterflies and dragonflies out of brightly colored paper and glitter and glue and clothes pins (I'm not a craft man, myself, but even I was impressed by how pretty our finished products were, and I was even more impressed with how relaxed and outwardly unperturbed Kristin was about our kids raining tiny, tiny specks of glitter all around her beautiful living room), but the actual focus of the play date was the consumption of a lot of delicious, carb-loaded baked goods. There were two kinds of muffins, lemon and chocolate, and two kinds of cookies, pumpkin spice and chocolate, and these foods made up Henry's breakfast and lunch for the day. So it was brunch; I guess you could say it was brunch. The chocolate muffins I brought were made with a can of pumpkin, the amount of which on a per-muffin basis was infinitesimally small, but I used this nutrient-rich ingredient as justification for Henry's eating muffins and cookies for two of his three meals that day.

On Wednesday evening, I escaped the house alone and went with my friend Cindy to a consignment sale at the local Catholic church. I was under strict, self-imposed orders not to buy toys, only clothes or other necessary, non-toy items. All was well at first; I dutifully rifled through first the size 4T, then the size 18-month boys' clothing and came away with a number of minimally-worn spring items for each boy. Then I wandered over to the toy areas of the sale, just to have a look around (no toys no toys no toys), and there I found an action figure in which I was certain Henry would be very interested. Now, Henry has recently taken an interest in a volume of Dr. Seuss books that includes Maybe You Should Fly a Jet, Maybe You Should Be a Vet, which contains a variety of career suggestions. He has seized on "maybe you should be a spy" as one potential profession, and he's expressed a desire to have a spy to play with. Specifically, he wanted a spy and some grass, over which the spy might peer out at others unnoticed. I immediately thought of Easter grass as one means of realizing this fantasy, but where on earth to find a toy spy??? At the Catholic church consignment sale, as it turns out. Technically, the small figure on which my eyes alit in the toy area of the sale was a masked bank robber, but strip away his nightstick (baton? cudgel?) and bag of stolen money, and you have a pretty convincing spy. I presented him to Henry - "Mommy found you a spy!" - when I got home, and he was convinced. The spy accompanied us wherever we went throughout the remainder of the week.

On Thursday, we went to "Tot Time" in a gym at a community center in Goodlettsville with our friends Melanie and Claudia...our play there was uneventful until Henry fell and busted his lip on the floor. It bled a bit, pressure was applied, hugs were given, a few tears were shed, and then it was over, no big deal. The fall did occasion a bit of incredibly enlightening parenting advice from a mother there whose four unruly (lively? spirited?) children were terrorizing the other kids in the gym. She counseled me not to "baby" my children too much when they get hurt, or I'll have a couple of flaccid, clingy, defenseless wimps on my hands in the near future. Well, those weren't her exact words, but that was the general thrust. I cut our conversation short before we could broach the parenting topics of cosleeping, breastfeeding beyond a year, corporal punishment, etc., but I'm fairly certain I know where she stood on those issues, too. (Contra, contra, pro). Ahem.

On Friday, we returned to the Nashville Public Library for a puppet show with our friends Susie and James. This time it was "Alice in Wonderland," which Henry thoroughly enjoyed. ("I really liked that cat, Mommy.") Charlie seemed to enjoy himself, too, and he particularly liked the end of the show, when decks and decks and decks of playing cards rained down onto Alice and fell from the stage. He crawled over to one and picked it up - it was the Jack of clovers. (I don't know what meaning this might have, but it seems like it might be meaningful at some later date, so I note it here.) Then he got distracted by the thick rope on the floor just in front of the stage, behind which audience members are asked to remain during the show. He touched its stiff fibers and laughed. Then, before I knew it, he was reaching up to grab and tug another rope hanging down just above the one on the floor. I gasped, realizing that this rope was not a rope at all but a waist-length dreadlock attached to the head of one of the Nashville moms in the audience, and I jerked him away in the nick of time. We go into Nashville for culture and diversity (nary a dreadlock in Sumner County).

Briefly, some of the things the boys are doing now:

Henry: He has seized upon "Uh huh, uh uh, mm-hm" as means of affirming or denying. At first I thought it was cute, but now I'm trying to convince him that it's more polite to say, "Yes" or "no." He got a haircut last Saturday and looks less unkempt but older now, like about fifteen. He has been very helpful this week, and kinder to Charlie. He even helped me dust in preparation for the arrival of his other grandparents, my parents, on Friday.

Charlie: Charlie is still standing alone. Charlie is dancing!! He stands on his huge, jelly-roll thighs and wags his bottom back and forth to a beat, and I could just die of happiness. He is definitely giving kisses now, mouth wide open, tongue protruding, head leaning in toward you. Russell found him on the stairs, two stairs up, one evening, and although this is a bit frightening from a physical-safety standpoint, I was inordinately proud of him for making it up that far before he got caught.

Valentine's Day, Tripping Up, And Falling

This week started off with Valentine's Day on Monday, which Russell and I ordinarily don't really observe (Valentine's Day, not Monday - Monday we just sort of tolerate every week). As with just about every other facet of life, this holiday is imbued with new (uncynical) meaning and fun when seen through a child's eyes. Sunday we gave Henry a (henceforth mandatory) heart-shaped box of chocolates (Wonka assortment, delicious...I know this because I ate approximately one third of them), and both boys got soft stuffed bears, which were a moderate hit. On Monday afternoon, Henry, Charlie, and I went with friends to a Valentine's Day dance in East Nashville. The dance was organized by an East Nashville moms' group in order to raise money for a community garden project, and in exchange for a small donation, we were given some basil seeds to plant at home. (Which reminds me that the seeds are still buried in their paper packet at the bottom of my purse/diaper bag somewhere, along with a small village.) The basil seed thank you gesture dovetails nicely with Henry's spice hobby, in which he displayed a resurgence of interest this week. There were lots of kids at the dance, and Henry surprised me by showing off a few moves, in between bouts of balloon-chasing. Charlie mostly chewed on a balloon, looked cute, and played with his girlfriend's shoes.

The highlight of the day (and possibly of any Valentine's Day) for me, though, came after the dance, when we went to eat at Rosepepper Cantina and were seated at a table right next to Todd Snider, whose albums I have spent the last year or so familiarizing myself with. He was having what I assume was intended to be a quiet, romantic Valentine's Day dinner with his wife, but unfortunately for them, they were seated in what the restaurant must have designated its kiddy/celebrity corner (of the three tables in this small corner, one was occupied by Mr. Snider, one by our party with its three tots, and one by a party at the table just behind us with a few more toddlers). I don't know if his dinner was romantic, but it definitely wasn't quiet. So anyway, I positioned myself at a seat where I could discreetly steal repeated glances at him while holding Charlie in my lap for cover. Naturally Charlie, who smiles at everyone, stared openly and smiled at Todd Snider (I had a chat with him later about celebrities and respecting their need for privacy), who smiled back with what I assume were whitened teeth. They were really very white. Then Todd Snider spoke to me - "He's adorable" - at which point I blurted out that the boys recognized him from a bit part he sang on a Farmer Jason video on public television. "From what?" Todd Snider asked, puzzled. "Uh, you know, Farmer Jason..." Finally he laughed and said "Oh yeah!" I hurried to add that we were also fans of his actual legitimate adult music, but that may have sounded too much like an afterthought to accurately convey my enthusiasm for his music. Oh well. I tried to get Russell to admit that he had arranged for Todd Snider to sit next to us as a Valentine's Day gift to me, but he is modest and claimed he knew nothing about it.

The rest of the week involved a mix of play dates and trips to the park. (Finally, we can get back outdoors! My very soul is glad.) Thursday we went into Nashville with friends and played at Centennial Park, which has two contiguous play areas, one for younger children and one for "big boys" like Henry. Henry got to play with his buddy Parker, whom he has known since the boys were six months old. Henry was as active on the playground as I've ever seen him, climbing up the various metal ladders on the play structure and sliding down even the highest, most spiraling slides. Charlie played a little--when I let him out of my arms to do so--but I just don't feel he's quite ready for climbing yet. As evidenced by the fact that when I set him at the bottom of a toddler slide, he promptly fell headlong onto the ground three inches below, landing on his head and making absolutely no attempt to brace his fall with his hands. His noggin absorbed the entire impact. I felt awful, he felt worse, and we jointly decided we'd wait a while before we set him loose on a park again. After the park, we met Russell for lunch at Woodlands, our favorite Indian restaurant. I'm proud and not at all surprised to report that both boys enjoy Indian food. I attribute this to their having had it so much in utero.

Finally, images of some of the indoor diversions we came up with this week:

The Great Indoors

Well, my new resolve to get us out of the house and having new, interesting, educational experiences was put to the test its first week out of the gate. The first part of the week, Charlie was sick with a mystery fever (teething?), and we were forced to stay indoors; the second part of the week it was snow that kept us inside, snow and a pretty vicious head cold for me. Fortunately (for us), the boys' Aunt Carrie and cousin baby Dylan came to visit and stayed for the entire week, so we had some great company while we were trapped inside. We did venture out Monday (to Target) and Thursday (to Panera and Kroger), but none of those places is exactly what I envisioned last week when I said I wanted to cultivate in the boys, and I quote, the "importance of gathering experiences, rather than things, for use in their lives' journeys." Mostly we were gathering things when we were at Target and Panera and Kroger. So, was this week some kind of a challenge, Life?? Was it? Well, this coming week, you are on! (I'm totally bluffing, the only interesting things I have planned for the coming week are a Valentine's Day dance in Nashville on Monday and play dates on Tuesday and Wednesday.)

It was an eye-opening experience to watch Carrie (Russell's brother's wife) with Dylan, their seven-month-old first-born son. It took me back to the days when it was Henry and me against the world, and I could give him my undivided attention twenty-four hours a day. Carrie is fantastic at being a mother, truly a natural, and she never loses her cool. I, on the other hand, feel like mothering two children at once is an effort much of the time and am inwardly second-guessing myself at every turn. My inner dialogue goes something like this: "Oh God, is this the right way to stop Henry from beating Charlie about the head? Is there a right way? Am I interfering too much in their interactions? Will Charlie grow up feeling hostile and defensive? Is it normal that Charlie spends longish chunks of time just shredding paper or gnawing play food out of the little shopping cart? Didn't I hold Henry more at this age?" I'm reading books on sibling rivalry and time management in an effort to ensure that both boys get sufficient attention, but it is quite a balancing act! Things will be easier (I tell myself) when Charlie is weaned and sleeping for longer stretches at night. And things are already easier than when Charlie was first born, for sure!

Very quickly, since Charlie just woke up from his nap and is sitting next to me chewing on my cell phone, here are the interesting things the boys are doing and saying at this moment in our lives.

Henry: He is very interested in smelling things, and by things I mean mostly perfumed things. Deodorants, makeup, candles, soaps. I don't know what to make of this; maybe his olfactory faculties are undergoing some sort of sensory-specific growth spurt. Can growth spurts be restricted to a certain sense? I've never heard of this. This may be related to last fall's fascination with spices...he actually started a spice collection and, during November and December, when asked what he would like to do (Park? Play?) his response was always, "Go to the store and look at spices." He actually got a spice (paprika) in his Christmas stocking. Spice Fest 2010 has passed, though, and now he wants to go to the store and look at deodorants. I draw the line at a deodorant collection, though, although I did buy him a three-pack of scented lip glosses one day. He has also mastered the expression, "I changed my mind," and uses it liberally. And he has picked up on my frequent use of "actually," though he seems to think it means "also." As in (before bed at night), "Good night, Mommy. Actually, I love you very much."

Charlie: He stands alone for five seconds at a time now, unassisted! His babbling has really increased in volume and frequency this week, but he still favors, "Ga ga ga GA!" I'm not positive, but I think he tries to give kisses now. Or at least, when I say, "Charlie, can you give me a kiss?" he leans toward me with his mouth open wide, tongue out. Kind of like kissing a puppy, but sweeter and doesn't make me gag. He also has started coming over to me, leaning in, getting on his knees, and grabbing me, as if to say, "Pick me UP!" More subtle than Henry's "Pick me up right NOW, Mommy!" but I try to accommodate him as often as I can. For the past few weeks, Charlie has been shaking his head "No no no no" and smiling. He clearly understands the concept of "no," though he openly flouts it as often as possible. He just does the head shaking trick for laughs, which it always draws in abundance. Finally, we've started planning a small birthday party for him next month when he turns one. I want to make as big a deal out of his first birthday as we did of Henry's, but part of me (the sleep-deprived part) thinks, "He's a baby, he won't even remember!" I tell that part of me to go take a hike, though, and try to think about what he might like on his cake.

"Stay At Home." Ha!

So what did we do this week?

Let's see...Monday morning we went to the Family Ministry Center's play area (one of the aforementioned trusty but tired old winter options) and were relieved to run into Debbie Blankenship and her kids there. Both boys played this time (often Henry opts to sit next to me, saying "I'll just watch for a while," so I was glad to see him climbing and sliding and jumping) and I got to have an adult conversation with Debbie, who is a very interesting person, while the kids had lunch. Monday afternoon we went out for ice cream at Dairy Queen, which always reminds me of my Dad (he used to take us there for Peanut Buster Parfaits or Dilly Dips, which I'm not sure they still have, which makes me old). The boys and I all sat in a booth, and Henry left his Roboticus figure (one of Russell's old Star Wars figures) on the table when we left. I had to lock both boys in the car while I darted back inside to rescue Roboticus, who by his name and physical appearance should probably be able to rescue himself. Please don't tell the police. It was so cold, I just couldn't bear to unstrap the boys, bundle them up, and carry them back inside just to grab Roboticus.

Tuesday morning I took the boys to the Gallatin Public Library for music time, which they both enjoy. It only lasts for thirty minutes, and as we are fifteen minutes late everywhere we go, without exception, that means we only get to enjoy fifteen minutes of music, but we still keep going back. Tuesday afternoon we had coffee with our friends Kristin, Selina, Keira, Cindy, Claire, and Baby Ben. Kristin has a newish latte machine that I covet, and I'm trying to think of ways to justify buying one. Our current coffee pot, a Cuisinart, we have had since we married, and it is maddeningly durable. Just crap out, already! Wait, I don't mean that. I just really want that latte machine. Would it be wrong to have a coffee pot AND a latte machine? Technically they are different, right?

Wednesday we went with the moms' group to Peekaboo Play Town (trusty old winter play area Number Two) and enjoyed hanging out with lots of kids and fellow SAHMS (that sounds so much cooler than Stay At Home Moms, it actually sounds like there might be intrigue of some kind involved, or at least leaving the house. I recently saw it written as SHAMS, which made me giggle). Charlie proved himself independent by crawling across the room without even looking over his shoulder to see if I was behind him. Henry continued to hone his skills on the five-foot rock wall, which he can scale alone now unless he over-thinks it. He is truly my kid. Wednesday is Kids Eat Free Day at Qdoba, just around the corner, so we ate there for lunch with our new friends Melanie and Claudia. This is exactly what we did last Wednesday, now that I think of it!

Thursday morning we went to the Delmas Long Community Center in Goodlettsville, where they have play time in a big gymnasium filled with balls, tunnels, ride-on toys, and lots of open, echo-y space. Henry ran around chasing or being chased by his best buddy Parker, and he surprised me by being the more aggressive of the two for the first time ever. "AHHHHHHHHHHHH" he screamed as ran, tripping over toddlers and balls. Everyone looked at me like, "Really? Henry?" and I just gave them my "Who knew?" face. Charlie explored, but didn't enter, a tunnel, and spent the rest of the time chasing after balls and a hula hoop. We ate lunch afterward at Chef's Market with moms from the moms' group.

Friday, Friday was my favorite day of all this week. (Sorry, Monday through Thursday.) Friday we went with our friends Susie, James, Christina, and Maddie into Nashville to the public library, where we saw a real marionette show. Henry and Charlie both loved it! It was an African tale about a spider named Anansi, a trickster given a taste of his own trickster medicine. I am a trickster myself, so I left somewhat chastened. Henry's favorite part was the brief song at the end of the play which was about being oneself and only loosely related to the trickster storyline as far as I could tell. He is definitely going to be musical like his Dad. Charlie mostly watched the people in the audience, especially Christina, and Maddie helped me entertain him. He was surprisingly quiet during the thirty-minute production. After the play, we went to eat at Noshville, which used to be one of my favorite restaurants, with our friends. Henry had pancakes and I had eggs, but the focus of the meal was on what James and Maddie had: smiley face french fries. As soon as I saw them, I knew I should have ordered them for Henry (the menu didn't SAY they would be smiley face shaped!), but it was too late. He fixated on them for a few minutes, but then his friends shared with him; crisis averted. Susie and James rode with us to and from Nashville, and we enjoyed the company. We listened to a CD of kids' songs on the ride home, and, as I always do when Henry is harassing me in the van, I had to turn the volume up very loud at one point and sing at the top of my lungs. This time it was during "John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt." I think it was at this moment that Susie began to have second thoughts about riding with us.

Starting Over

Finally, a new Moore family blog that will pick up where the now-defunct "Henry Times" left off. A year and a half has elapsed since the 'Times bit the dust. My extreme guilt at not documenting those months in writing has become unbearable, especially when my fellow stay-at-home moms (how I loathe that job title!) keep whipping out sleek book versions of the blogs they've kept detailing the minutiae of their babies' daily lives. I will fall back on my tired, trusty old Sleep Deprivation Excuse, since during that time I was busy growing, birthing, and then staying up long nights with a new brother for Henry. The addition of young Charlie to our family explains the new, I think catchier, blog title.

This blog's focus will be on what we are doing each week with the boys, because I want to emphasize to Henry and Charlie as they grow the importance of gathering experiences, rather than things, for use in their lives' journeys. This will also keep me accountable, because during the past several long winter months, I've found myself slipping into a routine whereby we venture out only to the same tired old play areas. I can feel myself getting bored, and Henry's behavior at times suggests that he is less than stimulated, too. (At nearly eleven months, Charlie is still pretty happy wherever we are.)

I also want to capture and document each boy's language and mannerisms week by week, because looking back on Henry's short life, Russell and I have trouble pinpointing when exactly he became so completely verbal. It's hard to remember a time when he just babbled or pointed and said only a few words, though I know that was the case.

My goal is to write at least one entry weekly, probably on Saturdays during "Jill Time." I am resolving to do this blogging thing in a measured, restrained way (not my usual Oh-My- Gosh-I'm-So-Excited-About-XYZ-I'm-Going-to-Do-It-Thrice-A-Day-Until-I-Burn-Out style) in the hopes of staying with it long-term. So, here goes...